Unusual Grief Ritual

My counselor urged me to put some effort into a grief ritual, as a way of honoring my mother-in-law, Joany. I came up with three things:

First, I wrote the blog post about Susie.

Second, I arranged and rearranged and cared for the bouquets of flowers Dale received from his workmates. As some flowers died off, I took them out and rearranged what was left, eventually combining the two bouquets into one. I thought of it as peeling off layers of feelings, caring for the dying, and releasing what was left.

This week I did something I don't usually think of as a grief ritual. I baked a loaf of zucchini bread using one of Joany's recipes. While preparing it, Dale and I talked about his mom and how she loved to make food, especially for guests. Her kitchen was one of her happy places. The zucchini bread was aromatic and very tasty!

As I ate my piece, Joany loved me back.

Hearts really do follow me around.