On to Plan B

For the last two years, I've taken some time to explore my creative drives more deeply. When I began my Creative Journey, I thought that I would be trying out various art and craft ideas, learning a bunch of needlework finishing techniques, reading a ton of books. Lose some weight. All of this was to be in an attempt to figure out what I was to do with myself in my life chapter as a middle-aged woman.

Would I begin a new career? Would I go back to school for a Master's degree? Now that my family is mostly raised, would I devote more of my time to volunteer work or artistic pursuits?

Well. I did a bit of those things. At least, I asked the questions. But even on sabbatical, life gets in the way. I didn't know I'd be facing a health problem or that my emotions would be taken for a wild roller coaster ride. I didn't anticipate landing back in counseling to work through more inner 'junque'.

I did stitch some more. I found out how much I love being part of two groups of women who create quilts for people in crisis. I learned just how much that makes my heart grow.

I managed to try a few new needlework finishing techniques. But I found out I was even better at pointing my finishing group to other tutorials online than I was at creating a new tutorial each month (my original goal).

I even managed to lose 35 pounds so far!

I still have not made a basket, though I still have the kit. I still have not made polymer clay beads or buttons, though the clay sits on my shelf. I still have not stenciled the lower porch so that it looks like cobblestone, though I can see the supplies resting on the shelf to my right of my desk. I still have not taught my youngest daughter to sew, though a dress sits half made hiding someplace here in my studio. I still have not done a major update on my Stitcher's Studio, though I've been very consistent with posting to my blog.

I still have a huge pile of books to read. I think the pile got bigger, even though I did manage to read a fair number and to write book reviews for them. I love reading. I learned I don't allow myself the quiet time to do it. My husband and I are once again trying to maintain the discipline to read every Tuesday and Thursday evening.

I have not discovered my next career move, either. That's a bit disappointing. But I do have a kernel of an idea of what that career might be.

My biggest discovery in these last two years was in photography. I learned that even if you don't really know what you're doing when you start, if you just keep at it, you can learn some stuff along the way. I'm better at framing images now. I know a bit more about lighting. I can even use my image software more adeptly. But mostly, I learned that I love to photograph life's little details. Macro photography stirs my heart. I'll keep at that. Learn some more.

The other important discovery is that I'm really not great at going with the flow. I tend to be more Type A. I like my lists. I like crossing things off them. I like having a plan and sticking to it. And I get rather anxious when those plans get changed without my consent.

So as I close out my Creative Journey today, I'll move on to my next phase. I'm going to call it "Plan B."

What is Plan B? I guess you might call it planned obsolescence. Or ... PLANNING to go with the flow. I'm sure I'll still have my lists ... that's extremely ingrained in me. But I will leave some blank lines on my list on purpose. I'll leave room to scratch out the plans that don't work and go with an alternate one that does. One that leaves more room for Spirit to flow through. One that leaves more flexibility for my family.

In other words, I'm planning to make plans and allow them to change! (I'd say welcome them to change, but hey ... I'm Margaret ... that ain't gonna happen.) So in Plan B, I can fool myself into believing that a change in plans is part of the plan.

Such convoluted thinking, eh? Yet ... it just might work for me.

Thanks to those of you that have followed me on this Creative Journey of mine and become a part of it. If you'd like to walk with me in Plan B, I'd love to continue to have your company.