Pandemic Brain Day Two

Wow. This smoke and lack of light and energy is getting to me. I really don't like this feeling of having "pandemic brain" again.

Dale and I talk about where I am on the emotional scale as a way to gauge how well I'm managing the bipolar syndrome I deal with. At the "one" slot is complete depression. At "ten," I'm manic. Thankfully, I've never been at either extreme. I aim for the 4 - 7 range. 6.5 is my sweet spot.

This morning I was at a solid 3.5 ... not so good. Whah. I feel like crying for no discernable reason.

So I opened my emotional toolbox and tried a number of techniques to try to get back to center.

• Concentrating on only doing the "next three things." Teeny tiny baby steps that move me forward and help get the motor running.
• Going for a walk. The smoke cleared a little overnight, but not much. That was a mighty short walk -- maybe a quarter mile, but I doubt it. It's not good breathing weather.
• Checking on the pumpkins to see how they're growing.
• Chat with the grandkids. Dale and I were gung-ho. But the little girls were not in the mood to be on a videocall. 
• Brunch at our favorite coffee shop. That helped some.
• Visited Jodie to give her a gift. That helped some, too.
• Making a jigsaw puzzle. More help.
• Watching an episode of Call the Midwife.

As I write this blog post, I can say that I'm at a solid 4.25. That's a decent step in the right direction.

Here's the puzzle that helped me today.

It's another 350 piece puzzle called Multicolor Pencil Crayons.

This was a much quicker build than yesterday's puzzle. Putting the bodies of the pencils together was easy and fun. The only tricky parts were the sharpened tips because of the way they interlink.

I'm so grateful that I've built up an extensive number of tools to help get me through my sad days.

Another method Dale and I used is called The Happy Things. When Jodie was a little girl in elementary school, we used to play this game to help give perspective to the day. We take turns saying one thing that makes us happy.

Dale and I played the game while waiting for our server to bring our food. It helped me get out of my head and into the present moment. 

• I'm happy I live in Oregon
• I'm happy we're retired and financially stable
• I'm happy we have good health care providers again
• I'm happy the artwork I do is no longer a job, but simply for my own enjoyment
• I'm happy I have many forms of entertainment, and am overflowing with content
• I'm happy I have a partnership with the best man I know, and he loves me too
• I'm happy I had four days this week with nothing on the calendar and no obligations

You get the idea. A practice of Gratitude can turn the tide.